Mentally injured

In 22 years of running, this is the first time I have to face it.

Physical injuries are more common in our sport and usually fairly easy to identify and get a remedy for. This one is a different kind.

Whatever I do, I do it with my heart which is I believe how I can give my best. I have always loved running and most likely always will. Yet, after the Skyrunning World Champs 80k in Chamonix in late June, I was spent. Physically and mentally. I was thus looking forward to a short break before race Speedgoat 50k, three weeks later.

Change of plans stopped me from going over to the States and thus tow the line of my first race of the 2014 Skyrunning ultra series. Needing three races to place in the series, I had to fall back on Ice Trail Tarentaise one week earlier. So instead of a 6hrs-ish effort I should have performed at SpeedGoat 50k, I ended up dragging myself  close to 9hrs on an unforgiving 65k and 4000m gain through high mountains and deep snowfields, sometimes head comes first !

Fall

This is where I believe it happened. Where I got mentally injured.
I had started my season early and been juggling between training and a startup I had just launched Twiinkly with two partners.
I hadn’t enjoyed my past two races, and with respectively 11hours and 9hours, that’s a lot of hours being frustrated. As a matter of fact, too many for me so  decided I wouldn’t  run until I genuinely wanted to. Since mid July, I have run less than 15hrs total, which is barely what I usually clock in a week, in normal training conditions.
Pretty lame yet I will stick to it as long as my fire for running on trails will be lit again. I’m not worried as I know it will come back.
Though I have to now deal with poor fitness and a major race coming up. Having missed KIMA to do the comments in english over the live video coverage at UTMB, I’m now out of the World Skyrunning Series ranking, so it probably also lifted a bit more pressure off my shoulders.
Live WebTV at UTMB
So for the first time in a race I will put my heart to have the best experience instead of going for the best performance. I will be pushing it on the parts I will enjoy most (knowing the Mikes – The Rut race directors – there will be plenty of these in the middle section of the course) and hope to make it to the finish line not too damaged.
Stakes of being “frosted” are higher than ever, and I am actually delighted to be spending as much time as I’ll be able to hold on for with such a strong and enthusiast person.
You can watch us all on the Twiinkly mobile app :
The Rut, I’m not ready for you, but bring it anyway!

The Rut

One Comment on “Mentally injured

  1. Pingback: The Rut | Martin GAFFURI

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